Bradley Manning’s Alter-Ego to Run for US Senate in Maryland

BALTIMORE – The boy named Chelsea/Bradley Manning, who was jailed for stealing classified government documents, before being given a get-out-of-jail-free card by Barack Obama, has filed paperwork to enter and lose the race for a U.S. senate seat in Maryland.

Bradley, who pretends to live as a woman, said that if he wins the senate seat in November, he may decide to become a congressman instead. “I might decide to switch.” He plans to run as a Democrat, of course. Manning believes his experience in stealing classified information will be an asset for the party.

“You know there’s still plenty of dirt on Hillary Clinton on servers within our government,” Bradley said. “I could find and dispose of that information before it’s discovered by Republican investigators.”

Bradley

On the prospects of winning and having a future as a politician, Bradley added, “Who knows? Maybe if President Obama finds himself facing possible jail time at some later date, I can return the favor by having his sentence commuted.”

Manning possesses many of the attributes prized by the Democratic Party; mentally ill, sexually confused, police hating, dishonorably (although he self-identifies as honorably) discharged felon. The sky’s the limit for this political newcomer.

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