WASHINGTON – While many pre-existing conditions will be addressed as Congress continues to work out details of a new health care bill, Democrats are freaking out, worrying that their debilitating, degenerative condition known as liberalism may not be covered in new legislation.
Obamacare covered this mental illness, though many Democrats could not afford the high deductibles for coverage. The condition is technically known as “Democrat’s Dementia” (DD). The name is derived from “Dem” for Democrat and the Latin suffix “-mentia,” meaning “condition of the mind.”
Symptoms of DD include; automatically gravitating to groupthink, adhering to rigid political correctness rules, threatening to leave one’s country if your side loses an election, not accepting a health care bill if passed by middle-aged white guys, seeing EVERYTHING through a racist lens, unrealistic feelings of entitlement, a belief that more money fixes every problem, an addiction to using scare tactics to get one’s way, a strong tendency to re-write history, a predisposition for protesting everything, and generally lacking a sense of humor.
The average Democrat has had this pre-existing condition for decades. There have been cases in which a few DD sufferers were cured and actually learned to think for themselves, going on to live happier lives.
Republicans realize that not every pre-existing condition under the sun can be completely covered under any health care plan. Liberalism may be one of those disorders that ends up on the chopping block.
** If you know someone who has DD, please do not say the word “Trump” in their presence, as this has been known to trigger the madness in their brain and may bring about incoherent ranting from the afflicted person, similar to Tourette Syndrome. Unfortunately, once triggered, the person may only be calmed down by the reassurance that Planned Parenthood is still killing plenty of babies.