stuffed

Democrats Open to Having Hillary Stuffed, Run for Offices Forever

NEW YORK – As rumors swirl about the possibility of Hillary Clinton running for mayor of New York City in the city’s next election, many wonder if Democrats will ever be able to let go of Bill and Hillary. The answer appears to be “not anytime soon.”

Hillary Clinton should not even be mentioned with the words “public office” ever again. She had her chance(s). But, it appears, Democrats just don’t know how to quit Hillary.

Man-on-the-street interviews, conducted at both the campuses of UC Berkeley and University of Wisconsin-Madison, were asked if they would be in favor of “having Hillary Clinton stuffed by a taxidermist – preferably, after she is deceased – so she can continue to be run for various political offices well into the future by the Democratic Party.”

Ninety-seven percent of the students surveyed approved of the idea. While 2% of those surveyed were adamantly opposed to the idea, and 1% did not know who Hillary Clinton was, the rest of those surveyed seemed resolved to this being their best hope for the future.

stuffed
So incredibly lifelike!

“I hate to say it, and I mean no disrespect to her family,” one anonymous female professor told us, “but, at this point, we just don’t have any better choices. I do believe a stuffed Hillary Clinton is our best chance over the coming decades, long after she’s gone, to try and regain the spirit of our party that we seem to have lost.”

“There’s just no one else with her political savvy and experience. I know she’ll continue to fight hard for women’s reproductive rights long after she’s left her physical body here, leaving it for us to prop up and use in her future campaigns.”

Sounds like a plan.

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  1. Rich Hoffer January 8, 2017 at 10:16 PM -

    Well, she won’t be the first person ever elected to office while sitting in a jail cell!

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