Hillary Clinton Looking Like a Turtle On Book Tour Interviews

NEW YORK – In her first interview for her new book tour, Hillary Clinton looked like an old turtle craning its neck out of its shell as she spewed out more excuses for losing last year’s election to President Trump. Her new book, What the Hell Happened?, will likely move very slowly on the book charts after it’s released this month.

She also admitted that despite the pain from her loss, she’s got a tough shell. Clinton munched on raw lettuce, strawberries and carrot pieces throughout the interview. And there were several interesting tidbits revealed by Crooked Hillary during the questioning.

Interviewer Jane Pauley asked how Clinton came up with her campaign slogan ‘Stronger Together.’ “It’s funny,” Hillary answered, “One night early in the campaign, several of my aides were brainstorming with me and one of the people in the group mentioned they were on painkillers for an injury. Another person said booze worked better for them. I said, ‘I can tell you from personal experience, Vicodin and vodka are stronger together,’ and the idea for our campaign was born.”

When pressed on whether her “basket of deplorables” comment cost her valuable votes, she answered ironically, “I found Donald’s behavior during the campaign to be deplorable, and his supporters just didn’t care. It would be like me committing multiple felonies with my email scandal and my supporters not caring at all about it. That would never happen!”

Finally, Pauley told Clinton that she looked like a turtle in the outfit she was wearing, and asked if she could really pull her entire head back into her oversized collar. Hillary obliged by retracting her head and leathery neck back into her shell, leaving only the hair on the top of her head visible to cameras.

turtle

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2 Thoughts to “Hillary Clinton Looking Like a Turtle On Book Tour Interviews

  1. What a great piece that perfectly describes a “career” in public service…ok…most of it was as “wife of…” but still…the turtle analogy is so apt!

    1. E. Williams

      THANKS buddy!!

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