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Hillary

Hillary Ready to Come Out of the Woods, End Hibernation

Hillary Ready to Come Out of the Woods, End Hibernation

SCRANTON – Hillary Clinton, appearing disheveled and smelly, told a St. Patrick’s Day audience that she was ending her winter hibernation and was “ready to come out…

Democrats Open to Having Hillary Stuffed, Run for Offices Forever

Democrats Open to Having Hillary Stuffed, Run for Offices Forever

NEW YORK – As rumors swirl about the possibility of Hillary Clinton running for mayor of New York City in the city’s next election, many wonder if Democrats…

UFC Fighter Ronda Rousey: “Now I Know How Hillary Must Have Felt”

UFC Fighter Ronda Rousey: “Now I Know How Hillary Must Have Felt”

LAS VEGAS – Following her stunning defeat in the UFC 207 fight against Amanda Nunes on Friday night, former champion Ronda Rousey was shell-shocked, and skipped the post-fight…

Hillary Tells Democrats to “Please Stop Trying to Help Me!”

Hillary Tells Democrats to “Please Stop Trying to Help Me!”

DEEP IN THE WOODS – A group of hikers stumbled across Hillary Clinton in a thick forest near Chappaqua early today. Since her humiliating defeat in early November, Mrs. Clinton…

Hillary’s Latest: “Pulled Hamstring Kept Me From Running Better Race”

Hillary’s Latest: “Pulled Hamstring Kept Me From Running Better Race”

NEW YORK CITY – Hillary Clinton limped to the stage a few days ago at the Plaza Hotel here, in an attempt to explain to her top donors why their…

Hillary Clinton to Open “Always A Bridesmaid” Bridal Shop

Hillary Clinton to Open “Always A Bridesmaid” Bridal Shop

CHAPPEQUA – Hillary Clinton needs something to do. Bill is freaking out because, if he has to spend a lot of time around her, he’d just as soon…

Hillary Tabbed as New Face of Makeup Company, L’ordHĂ©lpUsAll

Hillary Tabbed as New Face of Makeup Company, L’ordHĂ©lpUsAll

PARIS – Now that the election is over, endorsement deals have come pouring in for Hillary Clinton. And since beauty is the first word many associate with ‘Chipmunk Cheeks…

Clintons to Open New All-Inclusive Resorts Called ‘Scandals’

Clintons to Open New All-Inclusive Resorts Called ‘Scandals’

LITTLE SAINT JAMES – What do you do if your last name is Clinton and you don’t have anything to do now that the election is over? You…

Democrat Election Autopsy Reveals Hillary “Just Not Arrogant Enough”

Democrat Election Autopsy Reveals Hillary “Just Not Arrogant Enough”

BROOKLYN – On a conference call with campaign staff yesterday, John Podesta went over results of the party’s election autopsy report, trying to soothe the pain that Clinton…

Pantsuit Industry Decimated in Wake of Hillary Loss

Pantsuit Industry Decimated in Wake of Hillary Loss

CHICAGO – Just as factories were set to launch new designs and fill orders for pantsuits from coast to coast, Hillary Clinton’s loss in the presidential race has…