2016

Christmas 2016: The Year of the Revenge Gift

Christmas 2016: The Year of the Revenge Gift

NORTH POLE – Santa has reported a huge surge in “revenge” gift giving this year, as liberals continue to be incapable of controlling their anger and bitterness following…

Hillary’s Latest: “Pulled Hamstring Kept Me From Running Better Race”

Hillary’s Latest: “Pulled Hamstring Kept Me From Running Better Race”

NEW YORK CITY – Hillary Clinton limped to the stage a few days ago at the Plaza Hotel here, in an attempt to explain to her top donors why their…

Democrat Election Autopsy Reveals Hillary “Just Not Arrogant Enough”

Democrat Election Autopsy Reveals Hillary “Just Not Arrogant Enough”

BROOKLYN – On a conference call with campaign staff yesterday, John Podesta went over results of the party’s election autopsy report, trying to soothe the pain that Clinton…

Hillary Hangs With Her Homies, Pimps, Bitches, Jay-Z and Beyonce

Hillary Hangs With Her Homies, Pimps, Bitches, Jay-Z and Beyonce

CLEVELAND – Proving she’s the hippest grandma ever to seek the presidency, Hillary Clinton held a campaign rally where she hung out with her very close homies, Jay…

Female Hillary Supporters Voting With Vaginas Spur Changes to Voting Machines

Female Hillary Supporters Voting With Vaginas Spur Changes to Voting Machines

WASHINGTON D.C. – Many female Democrats, some Independent women, and a few trannies, have declared that they will be voting with their vaginas for Hillary Clinton this year. ┬áThis…

Wikileak’s Assange Says “Just Releasing Emails to Jolt Hillary’s Memory”

Wikileak’s Assange Says “Just Releasing Emails to Jolt Hillary’s Memory”

LONDON – Though he has become the bane of every Democratic operative and MSM Clinton cheerleader for releasing thousands of emails that are proving damaging to Hillary Clinton’s…

ISIS Weighs in on Trump/Machado Weight War

ISIS Weighs in on Trump/Machado Weight War

MOSUL – There are serious problems in our world today, but none more dire than the insensitive words presidential candidate Donald Trump supposedly said to a Venezuelan Miss Universe 20…

Hillary Clinton “Can’t Recall” If She’s Running for President or Not

Hillary Clinton “Can’t Recall” If She’s Running for President or Not

NEW YORK – Notes from the FBI’s questioning of Hillary Clinton this summer show Mrs. Clinton couldn’t recall whether she received training for classified information, was…

Hillary Clinton Avoiding Louisiana for Fear of Drowning

Hillary Clinton Avoiding Louisiana for Fear of Drowning

THE HAMPTONS – Tired of hearing about not visiting those suffering through the flooding situation in Louisiana, Hillary Clinton finally admitted why she has avoided the state. She said a…

Trump Drops Border Wall Talk: “We’ll Use Lasers”

Trump Drops Border Wall Talk: “We’ll Use Lasers”

NEW YORK – Presidential candidate Donald Trump has updated his vision for solving America’s illegal immigration problem. Trump has been criticized for his talk about constructing a tall…