Progressives Detail Guilty Gun’s Timeline in Texas Church Mass Shooting

TWITTERVERSE – The nation’s progressives have determined exactly what caused the tragic mass shooting by an AR-15 in a small Texas town on Sunday. Twenty-six innocents were killed when the gun went berserk and shot up a church in Sutherland Springs, Texas, with dozens more left injured. According to the country’s oracles and keepers of all knowledge, liberal progressives, here is the timeline of the deadly attack: 9:55 am – AR-15 decided today was the day to kill. Gun owner Devin Kelley was startled to awake with the gun pointing…

Read More

Jimmy Kimmel Graduates From Chuck Schumer School of Fake Crying

LOS ANGELES – Late night host Jimmy Kimmel has graduated from the Chuck Schumer School of Emotional Acting and Fake Crying. Kimmel completed his studies with a final exam performance on his show last night, using the Las Vegas mass shooting tragedy to promote gun control. Senator Chuck Schumer founded the school several years ago as a way to teach progressives how to use their emotions, platforms, and fame to push issues near and dear to democratic causes. Kimmel had jumped to the head of his class with several performances…

Read More

Hillary ‘Silence Her’ Clinton Weaponizes Stupidity With Gun Silencer Tweet

LAS VEGAS – Firearms expert and former presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton, may have stumbled upon the best slogan that anybody could come up for her. Forget ‘I’m With Her.’ After her comments regarding gun silencers, Clinton’s new moniker should be ‘Silence Her.’ In the hours immediately following the mass shooting tragedy in Las Vegas, Hillary pointed out that people ran when they heard gunshots. “Imagine how many more deaths if the shooter had a silencer,” she tweeted. Clinton clearly does not have a permit to use her stupidity in public…

Read More

Congressional Day Care Opens on Capitol Hill

WASHINGTON (The Barbed Wire) – The official Congressional Day Care opened today on Capitol Hill and took in its first Democratic clients after the politicians had a temper tantrum in the House chamber. Congressional Democrats threw a fit after not getting their way on a gun control bill. Rather than looking for other political options, the group of boys and girls vowed to sit and pout until the grownups caved to their demands. The political toddlers sat on the floor of the building where the House of Representatives conducts business,…

Read More