Trump

Trump Hopes to Send Democrats to Mars By End of First Term

Trump Hopes to Send Democrats to Mars By End of First Term

WASHINGTON – Speaking today to an astronaut on the International Space Station, President Trump announced that he would like to send Democrats and members of the media to Mars by…

Syria Strike Reminds World What a P*$$y Obama Was

Syria Strike Reminds World What a P*$$y Obama Was

FREE WORLD – Opinions differ on the motivation for, and the repercussions of, President Trump’s ordered military strike on Syria this week. Many world leaders applauded his move…

Republicans Gamble, Come Up Short on Healthcare

Republicans Gamble, Come Up Short on Healthcare

WASHINGTON – Republican lawmakers failed in their attempt to gamble with, and pass, new healthcare legislation today. The defeat was a big choke for Republican leadership, especially Speaker Paul Ryan…

Fox News Says Judge Napolitano Benched for “Disturbingly Low Hairline”

Fox News Says Judge Napolitano Benched for “Disturbingly Low Hairline”

NEW YORK – Sources at Fox News Channel are denying reports that popular legal analyst Judge Andrew Napolitano was suspended from the network because of comments he made regarding former…

Trump Sending B-52’s To South Korea

Trump Sending B-52’s To South Korea

SEOUL – With North Korea’s crazy little boy leader flexing his military muscle recently by launching missiles toward Japan, the United States is sending in the big guns…

World’s Top Witches Cast Spell on Trump and His Supporters

World’s Top Witches Cast Spell on Trump and His Supporters

EASTWICK, RI – Friday night at midnight, some of the world’s leading witches gathered to cast a spell against President Donald Trump AND all of his supporters. They…

9th Circuit Airlines to Start Flying Terrorists Into Country Tomorrow

9th Circuit Airlines to Start Flying Terrorists Into Country Tomorrow

SAN FRANCISCO – The crazy in this city is not confined to Nancy Pelosi. San Francisco will soon become the hub for America’s newest airline. 9th Circuit Airlines…

Hearing Health Concerns, Ruth Bader Ginsburg to Resume CrossFit Training

Hearing Health Concerns, Ruth Bader Ginsburg to Resume CrossFit Training

WASHINGTON – Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has heard the concerns over her health coming from those on the Left. Many liberals have taken to Twitter and elsewhere to…

Constant Liberal Butthurt Has Created a Permanent Protester Class

Constant Liberal Butthurt Has Created a Permanent Protester Class

The Church of the Perpetually Offended has spawned a new cult – the permanent, professional protester class. The cult is made up of people who have nothing better to do…

Trump Signs Four Executive Orders in His Sleep

Trump Signs Four Executive Orders in His Sleep

WASHINGTON – President Trump is in the zone. He’s come out of the gate at full speed during his first week in office. Following a flurry of executive…