March For Life Leaves Media Appalled at Lack of Looting, Arrests

WASHINGTON – The mainstream media complex is disgusted and appalled by the public display of civility, respect, and good manners shown at this week’s March For Life rally held this week. So far, there have been no arrests made of any of the well-behaved protesters. NBC’s Chuck Todd reported last night, “There has been no violence, profanity, or looting by any of these protesters at the March For Life! They call that a rally? What the hell’s wrong with these people. They’re behaving like a bunch of lunatic Nazis!!” According…

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Women Granted Right to Wear Giant Vaginas After Women’s March

WASHINGTON – In a major victory for the rights of progressive women – women who demanded the right to walk around as giant vaginas in public after last weekend’s Women’s March, President Trump signed an executive order today, granting women the right to do just that. Many, many feminists paraded around in over-sized vaginas at the march, but many complain they can’t walk around at their child’s school, the grocery store, or the mall wearing their favorite costume. Now they can. And while no conservative woman in her right mind…

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Women’s Marchers Name Michael Moore as Their Ideal Male

WASHINGTON – Michael Moore is just too good looking, too fit, too charming, and too smart for his own good. At the Women’s March to protest Donald Trump’s presidency in DC today, Moore was named “The Ideal Male” by millions of self-identifying females – most of whom admit that the stud is really the best they could ever hope to land, anyway. “Look at the queso dripping from the corners of his mouth while he speaks to us! And he smells like pepperoni. He’s a dreamboat,” said Mitzi Larken, a…

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