West Hollywood to Present Stormy Daniels With Dildo to the City

CALI – Most cities use a key, but, whatevs. The mayor of West Hollywood is set to present porn actress/stripper/activist Stormy Daniels with a dildo to the city today. Daniels is being honored for “her leadership in the #RESIST movement.” The mayor has also proclaimed May 23 ‘Stormy Daniels Day.’

The ceremony will be held in the parking lot of an In-N-Out burger location, which makes sense.  California progressives hope that young girls in the state will see that Stormy is a great role model for them to emulate. “If your boobs are big enough, and you’re slutty enough, you can make it here,” the mayor said.

Stormy
Describing the dildo she’s receiving from W Hollywood.

Daniels said she was overwhelmed with getting the dildo to the city. “This allows me to be a VIP in any strip club in West Hollywood proper. I’m so touched. So so so so very touched. Like, by everyone. Literally. But it’s been a rocky ride to come to this moment.”

Stormy most recently had a wallet thrown at her face by a patron during one of her shows. “It was scary. I’m used to ‘other things’ coming at my face, and I can handle those. I’m a pro. But that wallet caught me off guard.”

Note: If bad weather forces the cancellation of today’s ceremony, the event will be moved to a Five Guys burger location. “That’s no problem,” Daniels said. “I can do Five Guys with my eyes closed.”

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