ACQUITTED! 7 GOP Senators Given ‘Insurrection: Traitor Edition’ Board Game Instead

insurrection

WASHINGTON – President Trump has been acquitted of inciting the Jan. 6 riots on Capitol Hill. The sham impeachment trial is over. The waste of Americans’ time is over. But some politicians won’t be going home empty-handed.

Seven Republican senators voted to convict Trump, along with every Democrat. At least these ‘Sappy 7’ GOP turncoats will be taking home the ‘Trump Insurrection: Traitor Edition‘ board game as a consolation prize.

Senator Chuck Schumer said after the acquittal, “We want to thank these seven senators for playing. Obviously, we’re disappointed that our trumped up charges didn’t stick. But we hope these senators will enjoy endless hours with family and friends, playing our Insurrection board game.”

The board game should help entertain the seven Republicans as they pass time until being primaried at the end of their current terms. The ‘Sappy 7’ includes Senators Burr, Cassidy, Collins, Murkowski, Romney, Sasse, and Toomey. They represent yet another nail in the Republican Party’s coffin.

The Wild Card. When drawn, the player has to start over.

As players move their two-faced game pieces around the board, they take turns drawing cards. Each card contains a tweet by the former president that the player then misconstrues, overreacts to, or whines about.

There are also squares players can land on that allows them to stab their president, or a fellow player, in the back – figuratively, that is. The first player to reach the “WRONG CONCLUSION” circle in the middle of the game board is declared the winner.

Of course, even though a winner is crowned at the conclusion of each game, these 7 GOP senators will always be losers.

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