NEW YORK – During a CNN town hall event on Monday, Democrats’ favorite socialist, Bernie Sanders, said the Boston Bomber should be given the right to vote for his party from prison. Several other 2020 candidates seemed to be in agreement with the proposal.
When asked if felons like the Boston Marathon Bomber should be given back their right to vote, Sanders answered, “I do believe the one brother should be allowed to vote from his cell, and his dead brother should be allowed to vote from Hell.”
Bernie’s base loved the idea. “I love the idea of blowing up the whole voter rights system in this country! And who better to blow it up than the Boston Bombers? Bernie is the bomb!” remarked Patrice Summers, a sophomore social justice warrior from Dartmouth.
Candidate Kamala Harris said there needed to be a national conversation on the topic, while Mayor Pete Butthead disagreed with Bernie’s sentiments.
“Even terrible people in prisons can be useful Democrats,” Sanders reminded the audience. Finally, campaign insiders say Sanders plans to soon unveil a plan that would allow dogs in animal shelters to vote as well.