LAREDO – Administration officials took issue today with Republican lawmakers over the way they are handling the Biden border crisis. They insist that unaccompanied children are not being held in cages.
“We are currently housing these undocumented children in ‘tiny cells,’ not ‘cages,'” Biden spokeshuman Jen Psaki told reporters. “The term cages is disingenuous, and should only be used to falsely accuse a Republican president with being barbaric and uncaring. We prefer the term tiny cells.”
“Look, people love those tiny homes. You know, the ones they show on HGTV? They’re so cute. This is like that. It’s cozy. The kids love their tiny cells and in no way feel like they’re being held in cages.”
Psaki then said, “If we allowed you in the media to go to the border, and you asked these kids about their accommodations, they would all say they’re thankful to Warden Biden for his hospitality. I guarantee that.”
CNN and MSNBC anchors unanimously agreed with Psaki’s comments, saying evil cages are only used during Republican administrations. They added that the tiny cells are quite comfortable – each one being lined with good intentions.