Biden Floats Ferraro, Barbara Jordan, Ann Richards For VP, Ruth Bader-Ginsburg For Court


WASHINGTON – Pandering for the female vote, presidential candidate Joe Biden said in tonight’s debate that he would pick a woman to be his running mate. “I don’t run as much as I used to,” Biden said, “But I’m still in great shape for a guy that doesn’t know what’s going on.”

When pressed about who he was considering as a potential vice-president, should he get the nomination, Joe rattled off a few names.

Biden: “Oh gosh, we have some wonderful women I would be honored to have serve as my right hand man. Geraldine Ferraro, for starters. This wouldn’t be her first rodeo as a VP pick. Barbara Jordan would be another excellent pick, I believe. And I can’t leave out Ann Richards, the former governor of the great state of Texas. Any of those ladies would make outstanding VP’s.”

CNN moderator Dana Bash: “With all due respect, Mr. Vice-President, all of those women have passed on. Is there someone still living who comes to mind as a possible running mate?”

Biden: “Aw, come on. I just talked to Ann a few months ago. And Geraldine and I crafted the Paris Climate Accord together. She’s always ready to step in and serve her country. You’re just trying to confuse me.”

Bash: “Well, how about the Supreme Court then? Is there a woman you would nominate as a justice, should there be an opening during your administration?”

Biden: “I hear good things about Ruth Bader-Ginsburg. She’s in the news now and then, so she must be doing something noteworthy. I think she would be a solid pick who could get bipartisan support for confirmation.”

Bash: “Mr. Vice-President, Justice Ginsburg is already on the Supreme Court. She’s even more ancient and feeble than you are, bless her heart.”

Biden: “Are you sure? I think you’re full of sh*t, Dana. But I’ll have my people check on that, and I’ll get back to you.”



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