WASHINGTON – President Trump has been living rent-free in the heads of tens of millions of Democrats for well over a year now, and many are finally saying “enough is enough.” They now want reparations.
“As the party of freeloaders, it pains me to say this,” a disturbed Senate Minority leader Chuck Schumer said on Saturday, “But if he’s going to live here 24/7, he needs to pay up.” Schumer was unsure when asked what he thought a fair price for head-space rental might be.
Socialist Bernie Sanders admitted, “I usually advocate for everything to be free, but in this case, I think an exception is warranted. I know Mr. Trump has been living in my own head, rent-free, for a long time. And my crazy mind is even paying all his bills! Even cable!”
Hollywood celebrities like Johnny Depp, Chelsea Handler, Cher, and Judd Apatow are complaining about Trump being a squatter in their heads, and not paying a cent for it. It should be noted that living in these heads is like living in a small travel trailer, as there just isn’t much space to begin with.
Many black entertainers like Chris Rock, Samuel Jackson, MSNBC’s Joy Reid, and Whoopi Goldberg also want back-rent, along with interest, for the time Trump has been living rent-free in their heads. But, of course, they want reparations for everything.