CNN – Dr. Anthony Fauci, keeper of all knowledge covid-related, has new mask recommendations for the very young. The doc made his latest degree on a recent show on the network that nobody watches. Ok, it was Brian Stelter’s show.
“Look, masks are going to be part of our lives in some fashion for years to come,” Fauci stated. “I recently recommended that children older than 2 wear a mask when they return to school. But since I like to play God, I realized we could do better. I now think we could build better future compliance if the unborn started wearing masks in the womb.”
There was no pushback on the suggestion by Stelter. Instead, he asked, “Now, how would that work? Would there be some sort of procedure where a doctor would insert a tiny mask in a woman’s womb?”
“Precisely, Brian. I don’t know yet what unintended consequences an in-utero mask would have on a fetus’ long term lung function, but that’s not my concern. My focus is on stopping the coronavirus. We need to start conditioning humans to comply with my health orders from the very start. I can’t tell you how frustrating it is to have some Americans questioning my omniscience.”
“I share your frustration, Doctor. Life would be so much easier if people just accepted everything we tell them and followed blindly,” Stelter answered. “Well, Dr. Fauci, I think you’re onto something here. Masks in the womb. You heard it here first, folks.”
Fauci then asked, “Aren’t you forgetting something, Brian?”
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” said Stelter, as he bowed to his all-knowing guest.