WASHINGTON – Disgraced former FBI director James Comey has admitted hiding behind blue curtains at an inauguration event, in an attempt to avoid a new President Trump. Comey is 6’8″ tall, but listed as 6’9″ on the FBI roster.
Trying to hide when you’re that tall has its own set of problems. Comey initially tried to hide under a desk but was too long to fit under it, and he hit his head on the desk when rising to his feet moments later.
“I tried hiding behind a lamp, but there wasn’t one tall enough for it to work. Next, I tried hiding behind some very heavy women who were attending the event. I told them, ‘you never saw me,’ but I towered over them, so that idea was out too.”
The curtains were a last refuge for Comey as Trump entered the room. Still, the incompetent giant got busted and had to engage the president.
In late breaking news, Comey has agreed to an open hearing in front of the intelligence committee sometime soon – as long as he can either wear his invisibility cloak or give his testimony from behind a curtain.