Felicity Huffman Begins Grueling Sentence At Federal Correctional Day Spa


SAN FRANCISCO – Few hardened criminals come out the other side of a 14-day prison sentence without massive mental and emotional scars. Sometimes, the harm done is irreparable. So is the fear many have for actress Felicity Huffman as she disappeared behind the ivy covered walls of a super-min security day spa in Dublin, California this week.

Starting with a strip search to make sure the actress isn’t smuggling Scantron bubble sheets into the prison, Felicity will feel uncomfortable. And there are a number of things to watch for when Ms. Huffman attempts to re-enter society after a brutal, 2-week stay in the federal correctional day spa facility.

“The recidivism rate for those convicted of college admissions fraud is around 87%,” Warden Bernard Stills told us. “We do what we can to distract celebrity prisoners while they’re here, but the vast majority fall right back into the dark world of college admission scams once they’re back on the streets.”

Huffman’s mugshot

Stills said those close to Huffman will have to be on the lookout for signs of scrapbooking addiction, a new affinity for wearing khaki, and cravings for prison slop like pepper steak, chicken tortellini, and roast duck.

To survive her ordeal, Huffman says she plans to pretend she’s on the set of a future movie about her captivity. “I know my fellow inmates are really method actors who are very good at their craft,” Felicity said. “I’m hoping I even get to make one of them my bitch, but, even if I don’t, I’m sure they’ll do all they can to help me stay in prison character the next two weeks.”

* top photo property of TMZ


Related posts