WASHINGTON – Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (RBG) is dead and the battle is on for her replacement. Democrats want to wait until after the November election. Republicans don’t.
Senator Mitt Romney (D-Utah) explained his dilemma on a possible RBG replacement vote before the election. “Hey, it doesn’t matter to me. I hate the president so much that I’d vote ‘NO’ whenever the vote takes place. And even though the future of our country hangs in the balance, don’t you think civility is more important? I can’t imagine angering Democrats and getting slammed in the media.” The thought made Mitt shudder.
Senator Susan Collins (D-Maine) said the ghost of John McCain told her a vote needed to wait until after the election. “I prefer to be wishy-washy in all of my positions. So, I consulted my old friend John McCain to see what he thought. First, he told me Justice Ginsburg said ‘Hi.’ It was so nice to hear from her. Then he reminded me that although it was fine, in principle, to seat another justice before the election, it was more important to screw the president above all else. He always provides such clarity for me.”
Senator Lisa Murkowski (D-Alaska) didn’t mince words. “Look, I’m just a bitch. The people of Alaska knew that when they sent me here. If I can undermine the Republicans, I’m your girl. It’s just a shame the GOP doesn’t appreciate Mitt, Susan and I for our spineless, cowering to Democrats and their media mafia. I hope someday, after the country has become a socialist disaster, they’ll look back on us and be grateful we were so civil.”
Yeah, that’ll happen.