Ex-CIA Chief John Brennan Rushed to Hospital After Accidentally Smiling


WASHINGTON – Former head of the Obama-era CIA, John Brennan, was airlifted to a local hospital yesterday after he accidentally smiled. Thanks to the quick action of his security detail, he’s expected to make a full, but angry, recovery. Speaking on anonymity, one of Brennan’s bodyguards said, “We don’t know what could have happened to cause his sudden change in expression. At first, we assumed something bad must have happened to President Trump and he was having a reaction to that news. But we later confirmed that the president is…

Read More

Why Can’t A Day Without Feminists Be Every Day?

On March 8, angry, bitter, attention-starved feminists will assemble in groups around the country to wallow in their misery. While normal women will be going about their lives, and taking care of their responsibilities, these feminists will be protesting. Why can’t #ADayWithoutFeminists be every day? Lord knows we could use the break! Maybe #ADayWithoutFeminists will be followed by #ADayWithoutWork, followed soon after by #AMonthWithoutPaychecks. This day will be a vacation for millions across the country. Half of America is still celebrating #4YearsWithoutAFeministPresident, so the 8th will just be icing on…

Read More

Christmas 2016: The Year of the Revenge Gift

NORTH POLE – Santa has reported a huge surge in “revenge” gift giving this year, as liberals continue to be incapable of controlling their anger and bitterness following the crushing defeat of their Queen Hillary. To express their hatred toward family members who had the gall to vote for Donald Trump, many are planning to spite those they reluctantly have to call “family.” Disgruntled Democrats are making donations to organizations like Planned Parenthood, The Sierra Club, the DNC, and others, in a Trump-voting family member’s name. The crybabies believe they…

Read More

Hillary Debuts Angry Singing Style on ‘The Voice’


HOLLYWOOD – Trying to divert attention away from the ongoing FBI investigation into her email issues, Hillary Clinton made a surprise appearance on The Voice, a singing competition show. She stunned the crowd with her stage presence and the way the stage fans blew her hair back throughout her performance. Her vocals were a different story: Judge Adam Levine: “I’m not sure what I just witnessed. I love Hillary, but this made fingernails on a chalkboard sound like a lullaby. Was she shouting a campaign speech to music? I have…

Read More