NYC Mayor Hints Giving Gift Cards To Rioters Would Stop Them From Looting

gift cards

NEW YORK CITY – Bill de Blasio is New York City’s mayor. Yes, he’s a real piece of work. He consistently sets the standard for being weak, incompetent, lazy, and an appeaser. So, it’s no surprise that he doesn’t fault the criminals who’ve been looting his city for a week now. “Appeasing the wrong side is my trademark, ” de Blasio said Monday. “That’s why, instead of letting the NYPD do their job and put an end to the destruction these angry protesters have wrought on my town, I’ve got…

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Progressive Phil Saw His Shadow Today, Six More Weeks of Whining

PUNXSUTAWNEY – Progressive Phil crawled out of his parent’s basement this morning and saw his shadow, meaning there will be six more weeks of whining for the country’s progressives. According to the Liberal Almanac, if Phil emerges from his hole on February 2, and Donald Trump is still president, there will be six more weeks of whining from those like him. For the past 8 years, the entire time Phil has worked at Starbucks, he hasn’t seen his shadow on this date. This indicated that Obama was still president, things…

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