ACQUITTED! 7 GOP Senators Given ‘Insurrection: Traitor Edition’ Board Game Instead

insurrection

WASHINGTON – President Trump has been acquitted of inciting the Jan. 6 riots on Capitol Hill. The sham impeachment trial is over. The waste of Americans’ time is over. But some politicians won’t be going home empty-handed. Seven Republican senators voted to convict Trump, along with every Democrat. At least these ‘Sappy 7’ GOP turncoats will be taking home the ‘Trump Insurrection: Traitor Edition‘ board game as a consolation prize. Senator Chuck Schumer said after the acquittal, “We want to thank these seven senators for playing. Obviously, we’re disappointed that…

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Dems Given Mueller Home Board Game As Consolation Prize

consolation

WASHINGTON – Democrats just can’t win. Their insistence on Robert Mueller testifying backfired on them badly. But they’re not going home empty-handed. Yes, each Democrat in Congress will receive the Limited Edition Mueller Investigation Board Game as a consolation prize. Republican Jim Jordan of Ohio said, “It’s been a blast. I want to thank them for playing, but it’s time to move on. I hope Democrats will have fun playing the Mueller board game at home with their friends and families. The thing I like most about it, is that…

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Judge Kills Obamacare, Dems Given Board Game As Consolation Prize

board

TEXAS – A federal judge here essentially killed Obamacare in a ruling last week. Sure, there will be appeals for years to come. But what’s a Democrat to do in the meantime? Fortunately, the judge reminded them they will always have the Obamacare board game as a consolation prize. The judge recommended that Democratic leaders work on coming up with a plan that isn’t unconstitutional and forced down the throats of Americans. Then he thanked them for playing. The board game Democrats are left with is sure to be a…

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