Corn Pop And The Sugar Cereal Gang No Match For Badass Biden

DELAWARE – Joe Biden has lived quite a life in his own head. And he’s willing to share it with anyone who’s willing to listen. Finally, video has emerged that introduces America to the exploits of Badass Biden the Lifeguard and his nemesis Corn Pop and the Sugar Cereal Gang. As he tells it, Biden went all Baywatch in the early 1960’s at a community pool where he was a lifeguard. A player named Corn Pop wouldn’t obey when Joe ordered him to step off (the diving board). Words were…

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Ocasio-Cortez Considering Changing Last Name To Pelosi

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WASHINGTON – Alexandria Pelosi? Maybe. But is this town big enough for two Pelosi’s? Incoming Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has long cemented her spot as the biggest idiot in Congress. Now, a new challenger has appeared. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the ditzy darling of the Socialist-Democrat party, is desperately trying to out Pelosi Pelosi. “I say, like, 10 more moronic things a day than Nancy does. I’m even thinking of changing my last name to Pelosi.” “It’s kind of a way to honor her stupidity, but also a way to…

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