Statueism, Statuephobia Reaching Epidemic Levels Among American Left

DURHAM – Hatred and fear of statues has reached a fever pitch among liberal activists these days. Psychiatrists are seeing skyrocketing numbers in cases of statueism and statuephobia, in addition to the basic mental illness of liberalism, especially in poorly educated, college millennials. Statueism is defined as “prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against an inanimate sculpture, based on the fact that it hurts one’s feelings.” Statuephobia is defined as “an extreme or irrational fear of statues, especially those of historical figures.” Not understanding how to deal with their intolerance and…

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Democrats Freaking Because Pre-Existing Condition of Liberalism May Not Be Covered

WASHINGTON – While many pre-existing conditions will be addressed as Congress continues to work out details of a new health care bill, Democrats are freaking out, worrying that their debilitating, degenerative condition known as liberalism may not be covered in new legislation. Obamacare covered this mental illness, though many Democrats could not afford the high deductibles for coverage. The condition is technically known as “Democrat’s Dementia” (DD). The name is derived from “Dem” for Democrat and the Latin suffix “-mentia,” meaning “condition of the mind.” Symptoms of DD include; automatically…

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