Democrats Begging Tide for ‘Sour Cream and Onion’ Flavor Pods

Tide

NEW YORK – Despite warning labels telling consumers not to eat their product, people, mostly Democrats, continue to eat Procter & Gamble’s Tide Pod detergent pacs. The colorful pacs are becoming such a health issue that New York State legislators are demanding that the manufacturer stop making the pods so delicious looking. “Many of our citizens are not smart enough to know better than to eat Tide Pod detergent pacs,” a New York state representative who wished to remain anonymous declared. “Full disclosure here: I love the Spring Meadow scented…

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After Physical, Media Crushed That Trump Not On Deathbed

media

WASHINGTON – A dispirited media had to agonize through a nearly one-hour press conference by President Trump’s doctor, in which he informed them the president is in excellent health. Mr. Trump endured a full physical, lab work, and a mental competency test last Friday. After hearing the terrible news (to them) that Trump is not on his deathbed, members of the media relentlessly peppered the doctor with questions they hoped would provoke some tidbit of information they could twist to use against President Trump. Some of the questions shouted by…

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