Hillary Tells Democrats to “Please Stop Trying to Help Me!”

DEEP IN THE WOODS – A group of hikers stumbled across Hillary Clinton in a thick forest near Chappaqua early today. Since her humiliating defeat in early November, Mrs. Clinton has shunned most human contact and has started learning to live off the land. Looking particularly haggard, the hikers asked if there was anything they could do to help the year’s biggest loser. “Yes!” she screamed. “Please tell Democrats to stop trying to help me! I know they mean well, but I can’t take any more of these embarrassing losses.”…

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