Polls: Hillary/Trump Locked in Satirical Tie

AUSTIN – Pollsters at the University of Texas say that a compilation of polls from across the country show Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump locked in a satirical tie for the presidency. Results showed Clinton with a 45% – 43% lead, with 12% completely unaware there is even an election in less than two weeks. Margin of humor is plus/minus 3%, so the race is a satirical tie. Voters across all demographics admit that the thought of either candidate actually becoming an American president is highly ironic and twisted –…

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