Nike Debuts ‘Molotov’ Shoe Line For Antifa/BLM In Portland


VENTURA PARK – ‘Just Burn It.’ It’s a tagline all rioters are familiar with. To honor them, Nike just unveiled their new line of shoes for Antifa and Black Lives Matters protesters. The Nike MolotovĀ®. “It’s a very exciting line for the company,” Nike spokesman Colin Kaepernick announced. “If you’re trying to tear down America, it’s important to have the right shoe as your foundation. I believe the Nike Molotov is a game-changer in the riot wear industry.” A Nike model showed off the new shoe on the 100th night…

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Nike Mad That Betsy Ross Left Swoosh Logo Off American Flag Design

OREGON – Nike, Inc., the American shoe giant, has pulled their 4th of July, flag-themed sneakers because the company is mad that Betsy Ross didn’t include their iconic “swoosh” on her original flag design. Nike personality Colin Kaepernick recently pointed out the diss by Ross to company officials. “Betsy Ross should have had the foresight to know Nike would dominate the shoe market in the future, should have known their logo would be a swoosh, and should have included the symbol somewhere on her first American flag,” Kaepernick explained. In…

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Hillary Clinton Reduced to Modeling Shoes For Today’s Unlikable Woman

NEW YORK – She’s certainly not Cinderella, but Hillary Clinton has now been reduced to pimping shoes for singer Katy Perry’s fashion line. The new pumps cost $139 and feature clear acrylic heels. The shoes are designed for the unlikable female CEO, politicians, and streetwalkers. The fashion pumps are called “The Hillary” and come in two colors. The see-through heels have little golden moons and stars suspended in them, supposedly symbolizing an unlikable woman “stepping in and reaching for the stars.” She’s always striving to break that acrylic ceiling. Hillary…

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