Biden Variant Responsible For Spike In Death Rates In Afghanistan

Biden variant

KABUL – A new strain of COVID-19 is currently wreaking havoc across Afghanistan. The Biden Variant is the latest version of the CoroNoDontBlameUs virus, which has resulted in a sharp spike in innocent deaths in the region. The Biden Variant was engineered by woke military leaders, and released on the world by US President Joke Biden. It’s a hideous disease. The administration combined incompetence, arrogance, corruption, indifference and stupidity to tweak the latest strain. The Biden Variant was then given to terrorists to serve as carriers of the virus. In…

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Many Brits Going Back to Suits of Armor Due to Constant Terror Threats

LONDON – The string of terror attacks in England has many Brits returning to wearing medieval suits of armor as an extra layer of protection against jihadist attacks. The metal suits would help prevent many injuries/deaths caused by bullets, knives, and shrapnel from explosive devices. The Knight Shop, located in Colwyn, UK, has seen a massive surge in sales of their suits in recent weeks. Olly Richardson manages The Knight Shop, and says, “People are scared. I know suits of armor are cumbersome for everyday activities, but it just may…

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London Mayor Khan: “Come for the Landmarks, Stay for the Terror”


LONDON – The city’s left-wing mayor, Sadiq Khan, wants the world to know that his city is open and ready for business, despite several recent terrorist attacks which have put London on edge. While not wanting to address the obvious radical Islamist element in his city, Khan recognizes that terror can be bad for tourism. “Look, anytime you decide to go on an international vacation, you’re taking your life in your own hands. None of us knows when or how Allah is going to call us home,” Sadiq matter-of-factly stated.…

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World Leaders Beg Obama to Stop Saying World is Safer Now

EUROPE – Leaders from all over Europe have sent a statement to President Obama, asking him to please, please, please stop trying to reassure the public that the world is safer now than before he took office. It seems every time Mr. Obama opens his delusional mouth, within hours, a terror attack takes place somewhere in the world. “If we could just get him to shut the hell up,” France’s President Hollande said. “I mean, it’s getting to be like clockwork. He speaks optimistically about how wonderful things are, and…

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