NEW YORK CITY – On a somber but sweltering 9-11 here, a day that saw mid-morning temps soaring well into the mid 70’s, Hillary Clinton succumbed to “overheating,” and left a remembrance ceremony earlier than expected. She had to be lifted into a van by her handlers, and was taken to daughter Chelsea’s nearby home. Who even knew Chelsea was a doctor?
Fearing the incident could fuel the growing speculation that Clinton has some serious medical issues that her campaign is hiding from the country, her people issued a statement in which they called her condition a “medical episode.”
Nick Merrill, a member of Hillary’s staff, said, “There’s nothing wrong with Mrs. Clinton. She’s simply not used to being out in such hot weather. The heat index at the time of her episode was 77. That’s tough for anybody. Personally, I blame global warming for what happened this morning.”
Campaign manager and high school senior, Robby Mook, explained what happened this way: “If you watched the video of Hillary stumbling and falling, she was just doing an impression of her collapsing poll numbers. It was an attempt at humor, just like her ‘Deplorables’ comment the other day.”
The “medical episode” clearly sent Clinton’s campaign into a “spin episode,” in an attempt to ward off a coming “losing election episode.”
Finally, Mook told us, “Seriously though, we feel strongly that the sun was involved in causing Hillary to feel ill this morning, but we also believe Donald Trump had a prominent role in what happened too. We just can’t prove it yet.”