Tim Kaine Believes Answers to Life’s Mysteries Contained in Trump Tax Returns

VIRGINIA – After coming down from his debate high, Democratic VP candidate Tim Kaine explained why he just couldn’t let the issue of Donald Trump’s unreleased tax returns go during his interrupt-a-thon.

Kaine tried to tie a number of issues to Trump’s tax returns, including finding out how Trump would handle the crisis in Syria, of all things. But the real reason he was so incessant about the returns being made public is because he believes the secret to solving climate change is contained somewhere in Trump’s taxes from the last 15 years.


“I think there are all kinds of things we could find out from his tax returns. That’s why Hillary and I are so adamant that he do so,” Timmy said. “There are his foreign financial dealings, of course. But I think he is also hiding answers to other important questions that the American public has the right to know.”

“For instance, if heat rises, shouldn’t Hell be cold? Can a mute person burp? Can you put a gay man in a straight jacket? How do ‘do not walk on grass’ signs get there? Does putting a lightning rod on top of a church show a lack of faith?”

“I could go on, but you get my point. Until Donald Trump releases his tax returns, those important questions and many more will never be answered for the voters. So, Hillary and I will continue to insist that he do so. Nothing else matters.”


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2 Thoughts to “Tim Kaine Believes Answers to Life’s Mysteries Contained in Trump Tax Returns

  1. Emma Teves

    T.kaine is an idiot,,,,, he maybe a senator but he sure didn’t act like one the debate……he acted more like a circus clown and he was rude with his interruptions. Governor Pence interrupted Kaine only a few times, maybe three or four times but acted gentlemanly about it…… not manic like Kaine did.

    There is no doubt that Gov. Pence won the debate and would make a far better VP than than Kaine person.

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