WALTER REED – Just before being discharged, President Trump requested one last hospital meal before heading back to the White House. The president is being discharged following a successful treatment for Covid-19.
Trump requested ‘a heaping bowl of coronavirus and a gallon of liberal’s tears.’ The president said he’d gotten quite an appetite during his stay and that Walter Reed Hospital has excellent chefs.
According to his chief-of-staff Mark Meadows, “The president scarfed down the entire bowl of the virus. He washed it down by chugging the entire gallon of liberal tears. In fact, he said he was thirsty for more.” Liberal tears is a drink that Trump considers a delicacy.
Democrats and Never-Trumpers across the country were hoping they’d be planning the president’s funeral today. Instead, they’re forced to watch him walk triumphantly out of the hospital and back to work.
Media outlets are incensed by the president’s brazen recovery. “If we can’t take him out on a microbial level, what chances do our continued, made up hit pieces have against him?” asked Jennifer Rubin of the Washington post.
A downtrodden Rachel Maddow of MSNBC said, “The nerve he has of surviving this battle is intolerable. Frankly, I don’t know how much more of his winning I can take.”