United Airlines Flight Latest to Get She-Jacked


HOUSTON – United Airlines has had a rough 2017, just ask their passengers. Some have been beaten, dragged off and bloodied for attempting to fly on the airline. Now, the sky has a new menace; She-Jackings.

Last week, air traffic controllers at Bush Intercontinental Airport were notified that United Airlines flight 788 had been She-Jacked. A She-Jacking is defined by the Federal Aviation Administration as “an incident in which a racist member of Congress, named Sheila Jackson Lee, commits an act of entitlement against passengers on a commercial flight.”

Jackson Lee took a female attorney’s first-class seat on flight 788 and showed no signs of remorse after the plane landed safely in Washington D.C. a few hours later. Air traffic controllers sat on the information about the incident for a day because they feared being called racists by the she-jacker.

So, Jackson Lee went ahead and called the passenger who broke the story a racist. Sheila had a first-class passenger bumped from her seat on the plane because she’s an “important” member of Congress. The bumped passenger, Jean-Marie Simon, is expected to make a full recovery from the incident.

Despite the flight disruption, pilots insisted that Jackson Lee stow her triple-crown weave in the overhead compartment before the plane could take off, since it had been deemed a potential fire hazard by flight attendants. The FAA said they usually experience a spike in She-Jackings at times when Congress is about to go on long vacation breaks.


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One Thought to “United Airlines Flight Latest to Get She-Jacked

  1. Racist? Isn’t it funny that those that actually ARE racists are the first to call others racist? Kinda makes you think they’re lonely and they want to grow their circle, doesn’t it?

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