MUNICH – Vice President Kamala Harris is absolutely tired of being given hard assignments from President Biden. The VP is currently masquerading as someone who has a grasp of foreign policy, but fooling no one. She keeps using big words like “absolutely” to impress other leaders.
But since failing after each job she’s been given as VP, Harris is tired of the charade. “When they told me I was being picked for VP because of my color and my vagina, they didn’t tell me I was going to have to solve problems. I mean look at me, do I strike you as someone who has a clue?”
Kamala has already screwed up the US border crisis. This makes her the perfect candidate to screw up the Ukraine/Russia border crisis. As far as anyone taking her role as peacemaker seriously, Russian President Putin said he thought it was “cute” that Harris was sent to resolve the conflict.
“I don’t even know what a sanction is!” Kamala cackled. “I’m just trying to string together enough words so they’ll let me board Air Force 2 to go home. Why does Joe always give me the crappy assignments? I’m absolutely getting sick of this!”
Harris said if Putin doesn’t back down soon, she will label his aggression ‘an insurrection.’ “I just want to urge President Putin, in the strongest tone possible, do NOT invade Munich. Thank you, everybody.”